Monday, December 27, 2010

Getting Past that post-Christmas Funk

Usually I have the funk in the weeks leading up to Christmas, but this year is different. Since Christmas, I have hardly been able to do anything. I am over-tired, my body aches and is sore. My mind is kind of numb. It's just not like me, and I don't like it. Today I didn't even get dressed. Mind you, we had a blizzard roaring outside, and we were all couped up inside anyhow, but still.
The days leading up to Christmas were really busy. I was getting less and less time to sew, which is my natural mind-vent. It is what rejuvenates me when I am tired. Last Thursday, we spent the day at my inlaws. Celebrating with them is always an anticlimactic event, bordering on underwhelming. I know my MIL means well, but she just never gets her shit together before Christmas, and that just bugs me. Planning and being ontime are not her forte. Come to think of it, they are not something she does at all. She more or less bought the kid's gifts right off of my "do not buy" list for her. I had these already wrapped from Santa. One gift got unwrapped before I knew what she'd bought, but one for my son I made her keep. So that left him only getting a really dorky pad of drawing paper for Christmas. She'd allegedly knit him a scarf that says "Star Wars" too, which he'd love but she wouldn't give it to him because she didn't have the same thing finished for my other son. I hate that she has to give each one the same thing. If she gives us one thing, she makes a point to tell us that she sent the same damn thing to the cousin in CA, who we never see! Seriously, who cares?? We go from completely underwhelming to total excess. My family gives a multitude of gifts to each person. It would be a happy amount if it were less than half as many, but that will never change. My brother's family has been out of the country the last 2 Christmasses and they brought a ton of goodies from Europe. I felt cheap this year, but I will get over it. I did relatively little quilting for anyone, and chose to give size appropriate gifts. Go figure that this is the year that nobody else did!
My middle kid had been a total pill all week long. We had an incident with his school early on, and his behavior and attitude just left us both exhausted and frustrated. My SIL came over on the 24th with her girls for a few hours and the kids just argued constantly. It was, sadly, a relief when they left. I just hate this. They used to be all so sweet together, but that day was awful. We were kind of tense and stressed, just wishing that Christmas would be over once and for all. The thought of taking them to Christmas Eve church was just plain scarry! Plus, we normally go to a 5pm service, which is mostly kids, but this year I wanted to do a candlelight service at 7pm -- kind of clost to bedtime! We were left with no choice since my husband was out all afternoon returning a gift for Sophie that my MIL gave her the day before, and buying a new damn fish. You see, the week before I got my boys 2 Betta fish (male & female), and attempted to hide them in the basement for a week. Apparently, we have a very aggressive male, and he either ate all the food, or ate part of the female. On the 24th, I discovered her dead. Dandy! If that wasn't a sign, what was??! Anyhow, long ranting here...The XMAS eve church service was delightful. My oldest learned to read the verses of the hymns, sang and liked it. He was entertained getting to hold the candle. My middle son fidgetted, but stayed quiet. And Sophie sang her own little version of the carols "Farmer in that dell, farmer in that dell, hi-ho and a jingle bell..." - you get the idea, mostly sung when there was no other music playing ! The older couple behind us were amused. I miss going to this service because there is something very serene when the church is illuminated only by candles, and we are doing the unaccompanied "Silent Night". Something came back to us in that hour that had been missing all week. Hope. Baby steps for now. Christmas was nice. The kids were good, happy, etc. Slowly I will try to regain the sense of clean around here. And maybe contemplate a mini-diet. Too many cookies and fudge!
17 days after starting this, I took the quilt off the frame. It's not done, but I have been puttering with it minimally the last several days so I figured I'd put the machine to better use. I have a customer quilt needing doing. I suspect in a few days I will feel motivated to conquer it creatively. I like how the quilt above looks more off the frame than I did on. That is often the case. This is the backside - it looks kind of like leather. I sat and picked out things I don't like for nearly 4 hours today. Pebbling is such a pain to have to remove! Seeing it down, though, gives me ideas of areas that need modifying.

1 comment:

Debbie said...

Supermom...I felt like I was reading part of my history! Christmas Eve candlelight ceremony with peace in the family...priceless. Your quilt is turning out great!